24th May 2011

Its almost the end of the term!!! Arghh but why do all the things have to keep rushing us during the last week of the term??? =( The thread holding me up is thin enough alr! Sigh but what can we do? >.< we complain, will for time to pass faster, but it just never does.... the only thing we can do is to bite our tongues, and survive on. During this taxing period of time i realised something...

Little things easily make me happy... or sad, for that matter.

Like meeting your good friend after so long just to catch up

Like seeing a teacher(s) who you've thought didn't know you, unexpectedly say hi

Like a warm hug out of the blue from a classmate/friend

Like a smile or greeting from anyone you know

Like gathering up the courage to make a rather weird apology, only to find that it did mean as much to her as it did to me

Like one less scolding from someone you respect

Like a usually mean person suddenly treating you nicely

Like a friend suddenly tagging you in a note on fb

Little things that I have come to appreciate as my wits and endurance are stretched to their limits.

I'm glad i have such supporting people around me, even if they're unconsciously doing it XD I hope i can return the favour one day ;-) Haha okay time to get back to work...

"There comes a point in life when you realise who matters, who never did, who won't anymore and who always will. So don't worry about the people from your past, there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future" - i have never loved a quote more. It has the potential to comfort me in times of doubt =)

16th May 2011

Yay! Its Vesak day tmr =D At least another break, that is not taken up. Except for having to go for a 2 hour chem lesson tmr... oh well, chem is going to be fun, i hope... oh well. Hahaha School has been tiring, but chock full of new experiences just waiting to be tried out ^^ Except for learning math... there really isn't anything interesting learning about how to count up a row of numbers... Sigh okay, lets just say that my maths hasn't been doing very well ever since i came to JC. Unbelievable? Well, you better believe it. Haha i'm considering tuition again, but maybe after the June holidays if my term exams come out bad.

At the moment i'm just slacking away... although i do have a list of undone homework and more waiting that are due over the next few days. (laughs guiltily) I'm going to have to do work after I post this up....

ACJC's concert An Evening With Friends is fast approaching! I highly recommend you go cos the songs are just amazing ^^ there's accapella, sacred songs, chinese songs, tribal(?) songs... and more. Haha and we're not the only ones performing! There's our 20 strong alumni and the University of Auckland Chamber Choir =DD Okay this seems more like an advertisment now. Haha

Anyway, the choir is turning into overdrive again, as we work to perfecting the songs we're singing... i can't remember the exact number, neither am i hardworking enough to go count.. but its quite a lot. All the best to the J2s as they persevere on amid their exams while perfecting their music! I don't actually know what more to write here.... hmmm i should get to work =(

- in the end, you just read a product of procrastination, by yours truly - HAHAHAH

3rd May 2011

I could remember the date of today without even checking the calendar. This is probably because SYF is tmr =/ I'm kinda worried T.T There is so much to remember and at the same time i need to turn that information into something beautiful and priceless, filled with the love of making music instead of me trying desperately to remember all the points that my conductor has mentioned to me... That's HARD T.T But i'll do my best and hopefully, i can deliver that kind of music to the audience. Seriously, reading the sms my teachers sent us makes me want to cry... i think if i can truly carry this out tomorrow, i can finally know the true pleasure of performing as a chorister.

I can't stop singing liao. lol Haha Ironic how i am better singing outside my home than inside it. It's probably because my parents and entire family don't know that i can actually sing super loudly and i'm not keen to the idea of introducing that to them - in case they decide criticise a secret that i'm very proud of. Lol i put a lot of effort into perfecting my voice =) And now i'm working on the vowels... and perhaps realising the true pleasure of performing can also help my voice grow too =D

Aiya enough with the choir stuff.. i was supposed to go finish up my maths tutorial and do some chem revision! Arghhh

21st April 2011

I'm posting a lot more now! (Y) i don't know what i'm doing here since my fingers are hurting like mad now cos i just played on the guitar... haha considering the different emotional state of people around me i realised how stupid marks actually are. the number of As shouldn't be the decisive factor of going into Jc/poly. What if you're a weaker student? Your choices would be limited alr cos you can't do as well as your counterparts! People should go to schools that they want to go, at least they know that they have made the decision to go there, and they will have to live with that choice (good or bad consequences). Going to a school that you have to go, just cos you can't go anywhere else, i don't believe that that is the correct mindset someone should have when deciding their future school.

Anyway, serious matters aside.. i can finally play a bar chord! ahh~ so proud of myself man. haha it kinda helps that almost everyone around me plays guitar =)) i think quite a few of them are self taught too. And they can play like full songs Oooo... i haven't begun to even properly remember all the notes on the fretboard yet. Haha but my chords playing is quite okay alr. Found a super fun song to play: Hip to my heart by Band Perry. Its a fast paced, lively and cheeky song. haha And the strumming isn't restricted to a fixed sequence too, unlike most of the songs i know. I am trying to tell myself that i don't want an acoustic guitar. Lol But i do have to admit, the sound makes me jealous =/ classical guitar can't really produce such a nice sound. Oh well, i can only hope that, since i started with classical (which is said to be harder to play) i can switch to acoustic with... ease? XD

Choir has been... tiring. And on wednesday, i saw in someone, a reflection of myself. When i too was picked on by someone with authority. I'm not sure if i did help her in any way, but i hope she knows that the rest of the section feels for her, and we understand that she is trying her best for the section, for the choir. Perhaps what made me attempt to grab her attention and to encourage her, even a tiny little bit, was the feeling of empathy for her; i remember the 'seemingly not personal attack' - purposely you drawing you out in front of the whole choir. Purposely saying you are wrong for everyone to hear. I remember the drop in morale, the sudden irrational (or is it rational?) impulse to hate, and hate, and hate.

I'll continue to work hard in choir... and keep trying, no matter how many mistakes with make, how many scoldings we get. because we are dedicated - we chose this, I chose this, and i WILL carry it through.

Being reunited with friends after a month on Speech day, it was truly a great day =) Just thinking back makes me miss them so much! My classmates are really very fun-loving, so i'm glad i have them by my side for 2 years. The smaller class sizes and everything really makes us more bonded than usual. Ohh i got my collegiates today!! So happy~ they're like super expensive thou XD hahah

10th April 2011

Its been almost a month since i posted. XD hehe i'm always like that one la.. i dun like to post short posts. No point man. Everyone's integrating into the schools.. some better than the others. Choir is starting to look less bleak too. Except for the recent sessions when we sang the set piece and it sounded. OMG Soooo badddd =((( Thank God the conductor didn't scold... but i think we have a reason to expect one soon =( I think it was so the guys didn't start properly. And i saw Madam's death glare for the first time (directed at the guys of course). Haha it kinda regretful that the Soprano Section is so big =/ Its hard to get to know everyone... but its looking better now, so i'm glad. Of course the scolding was getting kinda depressing... but a guest conductor came by and things lightened up a little bit. I hope we can take advantage of this good mood and take bigger, happier steps forward. And Evangeline, do cheer up =) your choir seems so depressing... but don't let it get to you k! Choir really required a big effort on everyone's part..dun get stressed from other ppl not putting in effort k =(( Looking forward to seeing you on Saturday =DD (i'll be missing my choir session.... haha XD)

My class is fun =)) I really want to try to talk to everyone as much as possible and not stay stuck in a clique like last time! I guess it kinda helps that the ppl i'm usually with also mingle around too =DD i've recently started to get bullied, as in, not in the serious way. lol erh but i don't welcome the feeling of 2 ppl simultaneously poking or hitting me.. or poking me in the neck etc. lol my sister says all the small ppl like to get bullied. Then i told her Evangeline was an exception. XDXD i would like to write a whole lot more, but i have 4 tests next week... and a heck lot of homework, so i'm going to go off and do my chinese now. SIGH

20th March 2011

Term 2 is gonna start like... in 3 hours. HAHAHA Oh well, i'll bet it'll be tiring, but i hope it'll be fun at the same time =)) Anyway i'm supposed to be reading this GP thingy about education... but i'm kinda like procrastinating now cos, its so freaking cheem O.o Seriously.. haha I wanted to talk abt choir.. Okay so we like got scolded on Thursday's practice.. cos we weren't going at a pace that was fast enough. It brought my mood like all the way down into the mud -.- Seriously, and my past choir could even get away with working on one meager song for 5 hours.. No use comparing thou, cos i just got to experience the choir at like.. its best? And OMG even i was wowed. No wonder they won't compromise on standards.. especially when it can do this well. XD

Saturday was so cool!! =D Every time i think about it i get super exhilarated. We sat in mixed positions (and i thought we would never do that XD) and i could hear the bass part beside me and another tenor behind. The surround effect was super nice! XD not like last time we tried with my secondary school choir and i could only hear the loud seniors. Here, its amazing how everyone sings loudly, and contributes. Usually when instructed, there will be a change in sound, no matter how little. Its great here =) The only problem is finding people to talk to. Sigh =( I dunno... can't really talk to them, and we're not allowed to talk during rehearsals... maybe it just me making excuses.. i dunno. I can only hope that it becomes better.
Apart from that.. i'm quite contented. The syf period is looming over the horizon... hours of choir practice, homework, CA tests... they all about to come rushing at us. I can only pray that we have the perseverance to fight through all of it and emerge victorious in the end =D